Have you ever noticed how certain people are good at everything? And when I say everything, I mean EVERYTHING. I’m talking about people that can play an instrument, get good grades, and can probably recite the all 49 books of the Old Testament by heart. All while remaining extremely attractive and super sweet.

This article is about them. Well, about me. Well, about me envying them. Wait no, envy is one of the Seven Deadly sins and I just mentioned something religious in the last paragraph. Well, let’s just say that I wish I could be like them. That’s a better way of putting it without being sent to hell (eh, it’s probably gonna happen anyway). So, let’s go back to me envying them.

I have no idea how people can juggle things like school, a job, or even a sport. I can barely juggle school and watching shows that people recommend. Right now I’m in the middle of How to Get Away With Murder, Scandal, and Scream Queens (and I think I’m starting to get some of the shows mixed up, but shh).

No one really knows how hard it is to binge watch shows. Like, it takes a certain type of lazy for this to happen. Most of the time I get distracted and start doing something else, like sleeping, or listening to music. So, I just admitted that I’m clearly not capable of being good at sitting down and watching a TV show… great! Just great.

I’m pretty good at some things, like breathing. Wait no, I’m asthmatic. Nice. I’m not even good at thinking about things that I’m good at. Perfect people: probably like 1,500 or something, Catherisa: 0. I can’t drop out of school, so I should just drop out of life. That’s exactly what I should do.

People who are good at everything just make me want to cry myself to sleep at night because deep down, I know I’ll never be able to be as good as them. Like, to be honest, I only know how to recite 48.5 books of the Old Testament, and I don’t even know what 33.1847% of it means. I clearly pale in comparison to all you perfect parallelograms.