You’re sitting alone in your teacher’s classroom, learning, when suddenly, your belly decides to take revenge for being underfed.
GggEUGGHGEHGRGEG (* upset belly rumble noises*) GERUGHHHHEHEHER
The squealing of what must be hundreds of desks is followed up by EVERYONE’S heads simultaneously turning towards your big, red, UGLY face!
The teacher isn’t having it either, so they call you up to the front of the class. “EXPLAIN YOURSELF!” You stand there in a puddle of sweat, staring at your toes.
Their shout rings through your ears. You try your best to come up with an excuse…
“We- well… wha- what happened was,”
“What I was trying to say wa-“
BOOM!
The classroom door flies off its hinges, bolts ricochet throughout the classroom, and students scramble to take cover under their desks as the ceiling begins to cave in!
As the dust settles, a majestic silhouette appears. His six-pack, illuminated by the light from the broken window, drops every jaw in the classroom. The handsome man steps down from his pearly white Arabian stallion, prowling the classroom as if waiting to be challenged.
He finally stops and stares directly at you…
“You’re lookin’ real ugly lookin’ and underfed,” his deep suave voice rumbles the classroom.
“Here,” he says, pulling out a Clif Bar from his pocket. “Take this.”
You’re left with no choice but to unwrap the Clif bar in front of the whole class. The sound of the unwrapping drags on as the mysterious man stares you dead in the eye. You give him one last look before you put the whole thing in your mouth.
You chew and swallow as the whole class watches…
GggEUGGHGEHGRGEG (* HAPPY belly rumble noises*) GERUGHHHHEHEHER
Your belly seems satisfied! It rumbles in joy!
The mysterious man hops back on his stallion, galloping out of the classroom.
That’s it. That’s the end of the story.
So, if you’re ever hungry in class, pray that the mysterious, handsome figure will appear and treat you with a Clif bar.
